Saturday, December 17, 2011

Anybody See The Mop?

Tis the season ...

... for Christmas parties.

We had one last night for my staff. I helped clean up. (Debbie would say that I helped make things worse). I tried putting the dishes away (had some trouble remembering where the dishes lived). Then I took out the trash (that one was pretty easy), I dumped the beer tubs and then when I was just ready to read the paper ... Debbie asked me to water the poinsettias.

Now ... this should have been the easiest task all day. How tough could it be right? I filled up the jug and got to work.

We have about 20 poinsettias ... big ones ... small ones ... some clustered ... outside ones ... inside ones. I was proud of myself. I carefully filled each one with water. the ones outside seemed heavier and needed more water than the ones inside.

"Honey ... I'm done!" Proudly holding the water jug high, I confidently scanned the plants around me.

"Ummm ... that's very nice dear. Six plants must have been enough to really tire you out I bet."

"Six? Try twenty."

"No, Joel .. there are only six to water out front and in the back."

I looked at all the ones lined up on the floor. "Did you forget all of these?"

"Very funny ... you know those are fake plants."


"Joel ... you DID know that right?"


Ballad of the Big Prostate

Here’s a little country tune I wrote just yesterday to commemorate a dark day in my history. I don’t have a tune but realized you can use an...