Skip to main content

Do You Perform?

Sammy broke his hip this morning.

"The TV screen was lit up when I woke up at three in the morning," Sammy told me. "I went over to get the clicker (which was next to the TV set). I turned it off and I ... fell right on my ass."

I looked at Sammy as he lay in his ER bed, telling me the story. He looked so frail, so vulnerable, so scared ... I was really hit with the fact that he was 90 years old and won't have him around forever.

Just then a nurse came in and opened the computer terminal by his bed. "Sam ... I have some questions for you. First ... where do you live?"

"Menorah Manor ... nice place ... I love it. You know the other day there was a girl in my bed (uh oh ... here comes the old Sammy). She was ... naked ... so I said if I paid you ... would you get out of my bed?"  

There was nervous laughter from the nurse. I shook my head. As usual ... Sammy told a joke that he had totally screwed up and had no idea what the punchline really was. He had a big smile on his face.

The nurse tried to continue the questions for the chart. "Do you have any family history of medical problems ... like heart, stomache, etc.?"

Sammy looked at her confused.

"Sam," She continued. "Did your parents have any medical problems?"

"Yeah ... but it's too late now. They died."

She smiled ... "What did they die of?"

"I don't know ... heart attacks I guess. I have a question for you."

She stopped typing. "Okay."

"Do you perform?"

She was stunned. "Um ... perform?"

"Yeah. Are you doing my surgery?"

"Oh ... no ... I'm the nurse."

"Are you an LPN?"

"No I'm an RN."

"Do you have a certificate?"

"Even better ... I have a license."

"Good ... Then you can treat me."

It was a long day. The surgeon was operating all day and couldn't fit him in the schedule. Sammy was restless. He thought we would go out for sandwiches after he had surgery. I told him to be prepared for a long stay.

He frowned. Then when the ER nurse came in again he said ... "Excuse me honey. I'll take a room now."

Sam usually feels no pain ... literally ... no pain. He is amazing. He was in discomfort but really didn't complain much. The nurses were in shock.

They gave him pain meds anyway.

He was happy boy. Not a drinker, I have never seen Sammy high or drunk. He was singing, yelling, kissing Debbie, kissing me ... He asked the same questions over and over. "How am I doing? Did I have surgery? Why are you here?"\

He is resting comfortably now. Surgery is tomorrow and we will try to keep it light and upbeat. With Sammy, you never know who he will insult, kiss or ignore.

One thing I will guarantee ... he will make a new friend.

    

Comments

Kathrynwat said…
I've never met your father, but I think I'm in love.

Popular posts from this blog

SAMMY: The Novel (An Overview)

I finished writing Sammy:The Novel. 

So ... I called my good buddy and excellent writer, Dave Scheiber, to help me write an overview to pique the interest of publishers. The stuff that Dave wrote made me want to read my own book! We combined our efforts and here's what we came up with:

SAMMY (An Overview)

Sammy Levine, 86-year-old resident of Star of David nursing home, was not happy with his daily existence and dreamed of taking one last trip with his wife Esther (presently residing in an urn on the third shelf in his room). Sammy was careful about not exposing his plan to anyone, especially his son, Barry, who dutifully visited regularly and tried to make sure that he lived out his remaining days comfortably.

Through a carefully choreographed plan, Sammy managed to access personal information on three recently deceased residents from the nursing home’s computers. Then he applied for and obtained three new credit cards. Armed now with available cash and credit, he loaded up Esth…

I Need Your Help

I've been bad.

I haven't written a blog entry in ages and I want to apologize to my fan. (No that's not a typo. I'm probably down to one "fan") So here's an update ... I have been spending any free time I can get at our beach condo writing my Sammy novel. 

Getting pretty far into it.

I sent my first 50 pages to my buddy Dave Scheiber who is the best writer I know and who I hope to be when I grow up (which as you all know will never happen ... the writing part and the growing up). Dave's gonna give me some notes and I know him well enough that he will certainly tell me the truth ... that it is brilliant.

But until then I'm pushing ahead.

So ... the novel plot centers around Sammy (who is based on my dad) who lives in a nursing home, is depressed and plans an escape. He takes with him two urns ... one with Esther's remains (based on my mom) and one empty for his own. His plan ... go back to his hometown and visit his favorite places that Esthe…

Close Call

I was just putting the finishing touches on my new novel, Sammy, which will be available to order in November (shameless self promotion!) ... when I started thinking about some of the characters in my past life. One character I've actually written about in the past just popped into my head. It's a repeat story but I hope you enjoy it ... again.

When I was a Freshman at LSU, our dorm was set up like a suite with two adjoining double rooms and a common kitchen and living room. "Suite" really makes it sound much fancier than it was. Actually, living room makes it sound much fancier than it was. The walls were cinder block and the living room was about 100 square feet. I don't think four of us could even stand up in there at one time.

One of the four guys in our suite was the place kicker for the LSU Tigers. His name was Phil and he was from Bogalusa, Louisiana. He had the bed next to mine. Phil was about 6'8" and weighed well over 300 pounds. He was a big …