Monday, October 25, 2010

Weekend in DC

Here I sit at the Reagan Airport among the masses who await for the plane to Tampa.

I just left my wonderful daughter, Alissa ... I say wonderful because it aggravates her brother and sister to no end. They think she's my favorite ... just because I call her the "perfect child". (See entry on 12/23/09)

Can you believe it?

Actually, I call all my kids wonderful ... And they are.

But ... Alissa truly was the perfect child. Her mom called her that too. She was the kid who always slept through the night, was always calm, loving and found humor in every situation. She was the only one of my kids who watched Mel Brooks movies with me, laughed at Woody Allen ... and yes .... laughed at my jokes, too. Okay ... I admit it. Laugh at my jokes and you're pretty close to perfect in my book.

She lives in DC now and I spent this past weekend with her.

Of course the place is swimming in tourists. You can spot them a mile away. They have kids hanging off each arm, cameras around their necks and that lost look in the Metro as they try to figure out the ticket machine. I tried to look like I really lived in DC. I thought I really blended until the homeless guy, who I passed last night heading to my hotel, screamed at me to give him money so he could eat ... and then growled an obscenity when I ignored him. The dead give away was when I actually apologized for being a sonofabitch.  A true native would have somehow turned invisible.

Lots of dogs in DC. Most are tiny and most are walked by men. Other men are sometimes walked by men as well. It's a friendly place.

This weekend ... we mostly ate. I can't get over how many restaurants there are in DC. Seems like every other building is a restaurant and none are the same. Indian, Mexican, Lebanese, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Biafran, Samoan ... if you're from somewhere ...there's a restaurant from your area of the world.

Everyone eats outside, too. Even if there are only benches and no tables .... there are diners balancing their spring rolls and fighting with their chopsticks to make it work. Eating is an all day affair. Any time of day, you'll find these places packed.

Does anyone work here?


At one restaurant, I told the waitress that I had just read a bad review about the chicken pot pie. I didnt want to upset her ... But I thought she might want to know if they hadn't seen it ... Plus it was pretty funny ... The review said "the chicken pot pie tastes like feet".

"Oh my," she said. "We are known for our delicious pot pie."
"Well then ... all the more reason you might want to know about this review."

She took it to heart ... even got the manager as we were finishing our main course and getting to our dessert (I had steak .... didn't want to chance the pot pie).

"I want you to try the pot pie." he said.
"No thanks, really appreciate it but I just finished a steak. Delicious by the way."

Just then, the owner came up. "Did you try the pot pie yet?"
"No ... I'm sure it's delicious too. I know it probably doesn't taste at all like feet."
"Really ... I insist."

The manager appeared with a plate of pot pie filling and put it right next to the brownie and ice cream. He stayed as I tasted it ...."Mmmm ... "I said. "This is really special. Thank you."



Unfortunately I had tasted the brownie right before the pot pie ... it tasted just like feet.


2 comments:

Rod said...

funny stuff Joel..want another laugh? Our baseball drawing is approaching. Will you be there?

Joel Momberg said...

@Rod .... Thanks. Save me my usual place at the drawing. Are you keeping your tickets next year?