The stroller moms have an interesting routine. It's kinda like shake (aerobics) rattle (oh ... that's the babies) and of course roll (through the mall).
Saturday, June 28, 2014
Saturday, June 21, 2014
If I were a suspicious person, I would have been very nervous. Come to think of it ... Debbie's been acting strange ever since she made me rent Silence of the Lambs. She's also asked me a lot of questions about our insurance coverage.
I have to admit that I didn't feel much better when I asked her about it.
"What cement slab?' She asked.
"The one in the garage."
She thought about it. "Where in the garage?"
That Debbie. She's pretty funny. Turns out, the slab is a footer for (what else?) more renovations. This time it was to increase closet space. "Honey, I know that you have no space in your closet, so we are breaking through the wall to the garage and expanding your closet."
I was shocked. "That is so nice of you ..."
"I know." She said. "And after it's finished, we will switch closets and you'll have mine."
"It's still bigger than what you had!"
Wednesday, June 18, 2014
It straps on your wrist, has a rectangular insert that blinks as you reach your goal distance (mine is 10,000 steps) and syncs with your iPhone to make you feel extra guilty when you don't reach your goal.
It comes in two sizes: small and large. There is no fat wrist size available so I settled for large.
The first day I wore it, I had more movement when I slept than when I was awake. I reached a whopping 1000 steps ... 10 shy of a caterpillar.
The mall (even when it's opened for business) looks like it's closed. It's a pretty lonely spot. But it was perfect for what I needed: Encouragement. It is filled with people who have me by about 150 pounds ... and those are only the women.
Yesterday I got up to 5000 steps.
I was so excited about my new number! That was until I met the lady (pictured) in the photo booth.
She clocked in a 5038.
HOME MOVIES ... click here!
Saturday, June 7, 2014
Actually, to be more accurate, Sammy was really pissed off at me. I had been traveling and had missed a date that I had promised to play the piano for residents at Menorah Manor. I know, I'm not proud of myself. They even published it in the entertainment guide right under Israeli dances with Dr. Levine and Bingo Madness.
When I visited him last week, he didn't even look at me.
"So where have YOU been?"
"Dad, I'm sorry ..."
"I almost died the other day and you weren't here."
"You mean, during Dr. Levine's Israeli dances?"
"I am so sorry that I missed the piano date ..."
"The what? Oh, I 'm not talking about that. I had a bad stomach ache just last night and you weren't here."
Turns out, Sammy had a bad night but not nearly fatal. He's been juggling "nearly fatal" for the past few years. At 93, only 10% of his heart is working. The nurse practitioner that treats him told me that she brings medical students over to examine him from time to time ... a medical marvel ... the man who feels no pain and worries about a stomach ache instead of worrying about his organs shutting down.
My mom passed away in 2009. Up until then, Esther and Sam were a couple for more than 60 years. They were hardly the Ozzie and Harriet of New Orleans. More like Ozzy and Sharon Osbourn (Esther was Ozzy).
But that's a story for another day.
Just taking a break from writing the great American novel because I know that you ... my dear readers ... are dying to know what I've ...
Yogi Berra has nothin' on Sam. Today, Debbie and I went to Menorah Manor for his birthday celebration. When we arrived ... all the bir...
I try not to watch the news any more. Oh... I'll listen to a podcast now and then. Certainly, Debbie will keep me informed about all t...