When I was a Freshman at LSU, our dorm was set up like a suite with two adjoining double rooms and a common kitchen and living room. "Suite" really makes it sound much fancier than it was. Actually, living room makes it sound much fancier than it was. The walls were cinder block and the living room was about 100 square feet. I don't think four of us could even stand up in there at one time.
One of the four guys in our suite was the place kicker for the LSU Tigers. His name was Phil and he was from Bogalusa, Louisiana. He had the bed next to mine. Phil was about 6'8" and weighed well over 300 pounds. He was a big country boy. Pretty soft spoken and very polite, Phil really didn't say a whole lot for the first few months we were together.
One night, I got to know Phil much better ... up close and personal.
It was probably 2 in the morning when I awoke and found Phil sitting on my bed staring at me. He was naked. I couldn't move. In addition to be frozen in fear, Phil was also sitting on my leg.
"Um ... hi Phil," I managed to mutter.
"Phil? Something I can do for you?" THAT was a stupid thing to say.
Phil stood, looking right through me.
"Sometimes I have trouble sleeping too."
Phil slowly turned and got into his bed.
I stared at him the rest of the night. He turned over and fell fast asleep. The next day, Phil said nothing about the night before. I didn't either; but for the next few weeks I never took my eyes off him.
It wasn't until about a month later that Phil shared a secret that he had been wanting to tell me.
"Yeah, Phil. What's up?" I managed to ask.
"I've got this problem I never told you about."
(Here it comes)
"Well ... I have been known to walk in my sleep."
"Just in case. I get out of bed, don't try to wake me up. Okay?"
"Absolutely! Thanks for the heads up."
After a while, I got up the nerve to ask one last question. "Say Phil ... do you ever wear pajamas?"
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